Professional Boundaries

Have you ever felt irritated by the lack of time or the number of tasks to do in one day?  Do you sometimes wake up and dread going to work or feel unmotivated with your work responsibilities?  

This may be a result of boundary violations.  Boundaries are necessary in professional life as much as personal life and, when established and maintained, can contribute to compassion satisfaction and longevity in a career.  As a mental health practitioner, you are working with a lot of other agencies and individuals who may or may not have their own boundaries.

Let’s talk about some basics involved with the concept of boundaries.  Think of these as invisible property lines that protect and promote what you identify as reasonable, safe, and permissible ways for others to interact with you. These lines often will reflect your values.  For instance, if you value respectful exchanges then you may limit your interactions with what you interpret or consider as disrespectful communication or behaviors from others.  There are several steps to setting boundaries which are essential for your physical and emotional health.

Step 1:  Identify your values.  What is most important to you when you think about your life, care of yourself, and your connections to and with others? Your personal values will come into play in your professional life also and this is why it is relevant to identify these by making a list.

Step 2:  Explore current boundaries.  How do your current boundaries reflect your values?  What areas do you notice you are not inserting protections of your time and space?  

Some boundary categories are:  time, emotional, intellectual, sexual, spiritual, physical, and material (see Therapist Aid - What are Personal Boundaries? https://www.therapistaid.com/therapy-worksheet/boundaries-psychoeducation-printout).

Remember, boundaries can change and they are specific to you.  They can be porous (reflects difficulty standing up for yourself), rigid (reflects difficulty letting others in), and/or healthy (reflects balance, assertiveness, and flexibility).  Porous and rigid boundaries, although beneficial in some situations and relationships, contribute to black and white/all or nothing thinking.  In each of the above boundary categories, how would you define these currently for yourself?  What do you need and what can you take to improve these?

Step 3:  Identify acceptable behaviors.  Think about interactions or situations that lead to you feeling distressed or drained.  What contributes to the drain and distress?  Is this ignoring a value of yours and how?  You may even be able to identify specific situations where you notice increased stress.

Step 4:  Reflect on your values, acceptable behaviors, and current boundaries, and determine where you can make improvements to strengthen self-care and self-respect, take responsibility, and communicate your needs.  Make a list of what changes you can put into place.

Step 5:  Communicate your boundaries.  You can’t expect others to read your mind and know what is acceptable to you or unacceptable.  Remember, boundaries are unique to you so just because you value something or believe it to be a certain way doesn’t mean others will follow this.  Oftentimes when we are about to communicate something crucial or important, it can be helpful to talk through or write out how you want to inform others.  It will be necessary for you to identify the reason you need to set the boundary, how you will do this, and how you will maintain it.   There may even be natural consequences when someone decides to ignore your boundary.  It is your responsibility to maintain these, to practice them, and to communicate them.

Step 6:  Maintain boundaries.  How will you ensure that you are sticking to your boundaries?  You are responsible for communicating your boundaries to others.  You are not responsible for others' reactions or conflicts with your boundaries.  This can pose issues when you feel or think you are being selfish or feel guilty for others’ reactions.  Are you saying then that it is acceptable for others to mistreat or disrespect your needs?  Are you saying that others are a priority above your needs?  If so, then it may be time to take your power back so you can erect these invisible lines and improve your self-care and self-respect.

Step 7:  Re-evaluate your boundaries and your level of distress and self-care.  Boundaries change and shift with relationships and situations and may need re-evaluation.  Your values may remain the same but what is acceptable and unacceptable to you may change.  Part of re-evaluation will involve awareness and noticing of your level of discomfort or distress with relationships and situations.  If this has changed or increased, then it may be time to ask yourself a few questions about what you have done differently and how your thoughts or emotions may be altered or impacted.  It is equally important to evaluate how you are maintaining self-care.  Sometimes in your professional life you may cut corners to hurry up or not waste time when these moments of slowing down and being present may be exactly what is needed to increase your mindfulness and intentionality.

Step 8:  Repeat these steps as needed.

Identifying, establishing, and maintaining your professional boundaries can extend your commitment, stabilize your path, and improve your peace of mind and overall satisfaction.  Be all you can be for you!